It's been another weird week in retail. Asos released a product to secure consumers' dollars, Louis Vuitton takes on AirPods and Target gives bath bombs a delicious spin.
This, and more, in this week's retail therapy.
Garbage. But make it fashion.
2019 has been a dumpster fire of a year, so much so that retailers are literally selling garbage on their websites (and according to some Wall Street Journal reporters, it isn't actually all that hard to do).
Asos hasn't made a name for itself by playing it safe when it comes to fashion. Whether it's see-through pants or functionless AirPod dupes, the British e-commerce site has been known to push the boundaries of what's acceptable. But Asos may have truly outdone itself this time by selling something almost everyone already has lying around their homes.
If you thought you couldn't put a price on absurdity, think again. For just $9.50, consumers can receive two safety pins, which Asos suggests are earrings(?). But Twitter users were quick to call the brand out on its crap.
...ASOS really acting like I can't just get some from my moms sewing box pic.twitter.com/l0aNKuj4zC— Ayse (@AyseMehmke) December 19, 2019
ASOS are you okay? These are just literal safety pins? pic.twitter.com/EzN7qgmORa— Claire (@ric_claire_drip) December 19, 2019
Honestly, it's getting to be that point of the year where people are beginning to just give up (in more ways than one), so go ahead, rock these safety pins. And while you're at it, create a belt out of paper clips. It's called fash-shun, people. Look it up.
Louis Vuitton challenges Apple's AirPods
Wireless earbuds are having a moment this year. AirPods, while first announced in September 2016, have been one of the catalysts leading the wireless movement. Now the space is getting more saturated as big players like Amazon and smaller startups like Human release their own devices (though the latter reportedly was seeking to sell itself just three weeks after it launched).
And because Louis Vuitton has been known to release products it has no business releasing (like ping pong paddles or a Jenga set), the luxury brand is throwing its hat into the headphone ring as well.
The luxury fashion house is selling a pair of wireless earbuds complete with its signature LV monogram. And Louis Vuitton's entrance into the space couldn't have come at a better time. According to Hypebae, Apple's new AirPods Pro have sold out both in store and online at every major retailer. A true Christmas disaster.
But if you thought Apple's device was steep in its price, you better buckle up. A pair of Louis Vuitton's headphones will set you back $995.
Target: Bath bombs are so last year
Few things are more relaxing than soaking in a bubble bath with a nice glass of wine in your hand. Well, Christmas came early because Target is here to help combine two of our favorite pastimes.
The mass merchant is selling raspberry-flavored sparkling fizzers, which are essentially bath bombs for your wine. For under $6, you can rule the holiday party and wow guests with these fizzers that contain edible glitter stars inside.
And although the package markets these for wine, the possibilities are really endless: Mix it into your cranberry-vodkas, lemon-lime sodas, seltzer water, etc.
But for those looking for a slightly more cozy option (as if wine isn't cozy enough), the retailer is also selling holiday hot cocoa bombs. HOT. COCOA. BOMBS. The product, which retails for $3.99, comes in a pack with three different varieties included: milk, dark and white chocolate.
Target is out here living in the future, guys.
Subway sneaks its way into fast-food lovers' homes
It seems societies' love of fast-food is extending beyond the drive-thru and creeping into other aspects of our lives. Whether it's branded holiday sweaters with stitched chicken sandwiches on the front or a log that will fill your home with the greasy smell of fried chicken, the fast-food product craze doesn't appear to be slowing down.
Subway U.K. this week teased a product on its Instagram page that lets consumers bring the unique smells of the restaurant into their own homes.
While not available to the public (yet), the sandwich joint unveiled reed scent sticks that smell like its signature garlic bread.
As weird as it sounds, Brits apparently love the scent. According to Subway research cited by Business Insider, the scent beat out popular holiday scents, like gingerbread, cinnamon and Christmas trees, as the favorite scent in a survey of 2,000 adults in the U.K.
But really, the people arguing against this product are only kidding themselves. Who doesn't like the smell of garlic bread??