It's been another weird week in retail. Steve Madden pulls one of the worst disasters out of the grave, Kanye's praying that fans will fork up over $200 for his latest drop and consumers now have the opportunity to live like Holly Golightly, even just for a couple days.
This, and more, in this week's retail therapy.
Brace yourselves: platform sandals are back and as ugly as ever
Some things just go together. Peanut butter and jelly. Jennifer and Brad (ouch, sorry). Gaucho pants and platform sandals. And thanks to Steve Madden, the last combo is inching back to becoming a reality again. The platform "Slinky" and thong-style sandals that almost every girl proudly wore in the '90s are back making their unsolicited return at Urban Outfitters this season.
The Slinky sandals ($70) will be available in hot pink, bright lime and black, and the platform thong sandals ($60) will come in black, orange and multicolored silver. But unfortunately (or should we say fortunately), many styles are already sold out. We can't say we were all that surprised by this rerelease, though, as chunky-style shoes are cropping up everywhere this year. But please, for the sake of everyone with eyes, consider a different style. We're fortunate enough to live in a world where better footwear exists.
This isn't the only case of déjà vu as of late. You know how they say history repeats itself? Well the '90s are back and coming in full throttle. We've already seen the resurgence of scrunchies, jelly shoes, bootcut jeans and even lip smackers is trying to stay relevant with its latest collaboration with Crayola. And following along those lines, the Fashion Journal reported that fashion house Moschino and Sephora teamed up to drop a collection inspired by the back-to-school supplies we all dreaded picking up at the end of each summer.
We can't help but imagine what 2019 nightmares are going to crop back again in a couple decades. Bike shorts? Sock sneakers? Only time will tell.
You're going to need to start praying to afford Ye's latest pieces
At Weekend 2 of Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival, Kanye West hosted what he referred to as "Sunday Services." But the rapper has alluded to God and religion several times in the past, including in "Jesus Walks" on "The College Dropout" album. However, what's more surprising is the merch he dropped along with the event. Kanye is selling a $225 sweatshirt that says "Holy Spirit," according to an AV News report. Because nothing is more religious and holy than overcharging people for material things. Also included in the line are $50 socks that say "Church Socks" and "Jesus Walks."
For consumers who aren't as bold in touting the Spirit, but still want to drop an obscene amount of money on everyday clothing, Supreme recently released a $598 hoodie with its signature red box logo. Because the company is arguably the most extra brand in existence, it couldn't stop there. The logo is decked out in 1,201 Swarovski crystals that were applied by hand.
Screw avocado toast, the real reason millennials can't buy houses is because of overpriced streetwear brands. Ugh.
Tiffany's pop-up cafe in Los Angeles
Most people at one point or another have seen the film "Breakfast at Tiffany's" (and for those of you that haven't, what are you doing? Living under a rock or something?). It's a classic. So we can only imagine cheers broke out when the company announced this week that it will be opening a pop-up cafe outside of its Rodeo Drive store in Los Angeles. According to a Bloomberg report, for $45 per guest, the cafe will serve a prix fixe menu of croissants, a main course and three beverages (including mimosas!). The company already operates a Blue Box Cafe in its Manhattan flagship, which offers breakfast, lunch and tea.
The report also noted that all proceeds from the event will be donated to Baby2Baby, a nonprofit that provides necessities like diapers and clothing to children living in poverty. And while the fact that it's only opened May 4 and 5 may cause reservations to be near impossible, interested guests can stop by a Tiffany blue coffee cart for a complimentary cup of joe.
Brooks Brothers monopoly
Brooks Brothers is selling a $198 game of Monopoly, because we wouldn't be caught dead buying this $11.99 version? The game has a few new pieces, including the Brooks Brothers' sheep and a stack of Oxford shirts, but has some familiar pieces as well, like the thimble and top hat.
If consumers think that overspending on a children's board game equates to becoming a "real adult," they're in for a sore surprise. And this isn't even the most absurd game we've seen this year. Louis Vuitton reportedly is selling a translucent game of Jenga priced at a cool $2,450. Meanwhile, fashion house Moschino took a note from The Sims, the life simulation video game, with its latest collection reveal.
We're not here to tell people what to do with their money, but we are here to judge them for it.