It's been another weird week in retail.
Williams-Sonoma's Christmas catalog has one too many overpriced items in it, KFC is hoping to get on a fast food lover's wish list with a new holiday line and Wish.com has hit a snag in their plus-size tights advertising.
This, and more, in this week's Retail Therapy.
The retailer who stole Christmas
With Christmas just over a week away, retail has reached peak holiday spirit: Malls are decorated with wreaths, store associates are likely wearing earplugs to drown out "Santa Baby" (and the screams of young children) and overpriced retailers are still trying to convince us why holiday decorations are worth cracking open the piggy bank.
First it was Neiman Marcus, with products like the $50,000 decorative fridge and the $64,000 Hermes watch. Now it's Williams-Sonoma's turn to remind us all why Scrooge is the best character to channel when it comes to Christmas shopping. The Williams-Sonoma holiday catalogue is certainly less over-the-top than Neiman Marcus', but it does provide many opportunities to blow your monthly budget out of the water (and it has also spawned several comical backlash articles).
The collection includes $350 crystal trees, $349 cashmere bathrobes and at least five different bar carts, all of which are solidly above $500. As a curveball, the rug that the bar carts were pictured on was actually the most expensive item on that page, coming in at $2,995. If your Grinch-stincts aren't kicking in yet, you can also dish out substantial cash for a"brass jaguar sculpture" ($95), a "banana leaf tray" ($149), "stylized horse objects" ($250) or — our personal favorite — a "Yak horn on stand" ($350).
Sure, we might not be able to buy happiness yet, but according to Williams-Sonoma, all it takes is a few overpriced, unnecessarily bougie decorations to buy Christmas.
Trim the tree with KFC
For those with a tighter budget than Williams-Sonoma shoppers, KFC's got the remedy: a finger lickin' line of products that don't cost that much more than your average fried chicken purchase.
The fast food chain's holiday collection, reported by Marketing Dive, seems to be targeted at procrastinating holiday shoppers who have a certain chicken-loving someone on their list. The two most festive items in the collection are a $20 "Holiday Colonel Shirt" and a pack of $17 wrapping paper, which includes one roll of Colonel Sanders paper and one chicken-wing roll.
The shirt, which has "enough sleeves to cover your whole arm and even your hands if you happen to have short arms," sports a Santa-turned-Colonel Sanders profile, and is already sold out — because who wants to wear the face of a boring white guy when you can sport the face of… another boring white guy.
As Buddy the elf would say: the best way to spread Christmas cheer is wearing fried chicken couture for all to hear.
Ad campaign gets stuck in a tight spot
Plus-sized customers have felt underserved and underappreciated for a while, but until recently the worst manifestation of that was Target's poorly-designed plus-size line. All of that changed once Wish.com decided to advertise plus-size tights with petite-size models.
In a move that screams "we don't want your business," the online retailer used photos of skinny women stretching out comparatively massive tights to market plus-size tights, Buzzfeed reports. The ad, understandably, caused an absolute tirade on Twitter, with customers — plus-sized and not — calling out the company for an ad that's equal parts offensive and stupid.
For anyone thinking of praising the retailer for at least being original, it turns out the photos weren't even their own — they were taken from another company, which was trying to get across the flexibility of their tights, rather than jabbing a below-the-belt insult at their customer base. Wish.com reportedly hasn't responded to the backlash yet, because #iregretnothing.
This sure seems like a tight spot for them to get out of.
why don’t they just use plus-sized models... to advertise plus-sized tights... https://t.co/kOytUmqnmY— Anson. (@ansontm) December 9, 2017
are plus size people meant to look at this and go “ah yes the way those tights look on that not plus person is what I wanted to see! I now know what these will look like on myself!” https://t.co/pKrqYhjhA3— miss keisha? miss keisha? (@minaxbell) December 10, 2017
I love figuring out my size by conceptualizing how many skinny people will fit in my clothes https://t.co/671yBwB1Sq— molly (@mollyxflanagan) December 10, 2017
High heels from a galaxy far, far away
With the latest Star Wars film finally out in theaters, it turns out that Columbia's force-filled jackets weren't the only high-budget item inspired by the fandom.
Christian Louboutin partnered with Disney to create four star-worthy high heels based on four of the film's female leads, which are in the process of being auctioned off, Teen Vogue reports. Unlike most products we report on, the higher the price tag, the better — the proceeds will go to the Starlight Children's Foundation.
Bids on all four shoes are hovering between $7,000 and $10,000, with the heel inspired by Vice Admiral Amilyn Holdo leading the pack at $9,500, according to Charitybuzz. The Disney-inspired footwear doesn't stop there, though. A line of Disney princess-inspired heels is coming from Ruthie Davis, who plans to "cycle through the 11 Disney princesses as important princess milestones come up," according to the Hollywood Reporter.
Prospective buyers beware: these price tags aren't the fairest of them all.